It feels ridiculous. Taking pictures of myself in various locations, looking for the best light and pose. It goes against everything I have ever thought about being a 42 year old woman, well...any age really. Selfies have been a mystery to me for a very long time. You have seen the comical images and videos of young girls sitting in a row at a sporting event all finding the best image...duck faces by all. RIDICULOUS!
So, why am I defending the selfie now? How have I let myself be okay with this trend?
Here is why...
I want to be seen. I said it. I DO! I want you to be seen too. I want to see you! I want my children to look at pictures and know that I was there. How many of us have years of pictures that our dutiful parents took of us at one event or another that are quite without any representation of either of our parents? Moms who made sure that we had the experience but stayed on the other side of the camera. It was a gesture of love for many but a hiding mechanism for others. I would venture to say that an entire generation of women CHOSE to stay out of those pictures. Why? Oh it could be anything. Let me just state for the record; however, this girl is no longer afraid of the camera. Someone taught me several years ago that taking pictures isn't about what you look like or what you weigh or what you THINK you should look like. It is about a moment and remembering that moment, including what you looked like when it happened. Some photos will be unflattering. But you were there!
Now I know that there is a difference in taking selfies and being in pictures. Here is where I am about the selfie..EMBRACE IT! Let loose a little! Be silly! Glam yourself up and TAKE THAT SELFIE! Truth is that most people will never see that side of you unless you document it. Oh girls, we are so much more than mom and wife. Document the heck out of that. Don't let them live every day without realizing just how much you have to offer. Is a selfie the only way to do that? Does this argument even make sense? Maybe. Maybe not. But...that selfie makes me answer to myself. It gives me a chance to see me as others do. Not as mirrors do or hand drawn art work by magical toddlers. A snap shot of me in a moment of silliness and even, dare I say, vanity. Trust me, it is an exercise that will show you a whole new side of yourself. Once you get past the awkward "how can I really be doing this" and "what if someone sees me" thing...it's FREEDOM!
Let them see you! Let them see you take selfies with your friends, your children, your significant other and most definitely ALONE!
Disclaimer: this is by no means an invitation to be THAT girl at sporting events and bars. You know who she is. Don't do THAT! It's weird.
Wednesday, October 14, 2015
Sunday, October 11, 2015
Being over qualified for the measure of your creation
So many places to go. So much to see. to learn. to feel. to explore.
People to meet. to nurture. to love.
Create. write. sing. dance. act. cook. love. hold babies. float. laugh.
Work. bills. responsibilities. age. work. work. work. drive a lot. doctors. work. and work even more
Daydreaming about those places to go, to see, to learn...and so on
Restless. bitter. jealous. confused. depressed. anxious. or is it anxiety first. who knows
I have recently spent time listening to, reading about and contemplating ideas that center on living a full life. a creative life. a peaceful life. A centered life.
The measure of your creation. It's a phrase I love and have a new fascination with.
What is that? How do you know? On a spiritual level...that's easy. or is it?
Finding joy in the journey when the days are filled with mundane, daily living tasks that offer no personal fulfillment or creativity whatsoever is draining. Breathe, they say. Yes. Breathe. Take time for yourself. Exercise. Eat right. Take your vitamins. Drink more water. And breathe.
Yes. Breathe. The fascinating thing about life is that we are all, in many areas, overqualified. We take jobs that pay bills. We buy homes in cities because of good schools and low crime. We live our lives based on what we feel is best for everyone at the moment. And then we ask ourselves whose lives we are living? What did we do with our dreams? Where did that girl go? We hit our forties and there is this mad pause, just long enough to realize that it looks different, somehow, than the plans you had in your twenties. Not bad, just different. You look at yourself in the mirror and see age. You see tired. You see the pain that has happened over these forty some odd years. You also see the smiles. The age shows experiences. Some of them you didn't expect or even ask for but weathered, beautifully you might add. And you did. If you have been so blessed you see that younger face in the faces of your children who are now dreaming as you once did. And you are jealous. A little.
We call this a midlife crisis for some.
But wait...just breathe. Accepting that we are overqualified for our lives is freeing in some way. Are you capable of being a respected author or well respected scientist? I could ask that question about every possible scenario so which one is yours? Which life do you dream of?
The measure of your creation is, in my opinion, far grander than job choice or home address. More than the daily tasks. More than the mundane. More than all of it. You are created for something so much bigger than we ever give ourselves the space to consider. What do we fear? What excuses do we grant ourselves, a bit like the child throwing a tantrum is really "just tired". (no he's not, by the way. he is being a brat) So many excuses... and we eat it up. We crave that because it is exponentially easier than giving it a try. Stop it!
Good news...being overqualified means that you have more to give. more to learn. more to see. more to love. more to grow. That is something you can hold on to and look forward to the next forty years with eager anticipation or what's next. Who will you be next year? Five years from now? Twenty?
So dream. smile. love. breathe. vitamins. eat right. work out. all of it matters. But above all else...find the measure of your creation and strive diligently to live up to it. You won't because you will never really know just how important you are but try. Always.
People to meet. to nurture. to love.
Create. write. sing. dance. act. cook. love. hold babies. float. laugh.
Work. bills. responsibilities. age. work. work. work. drive a lot. doctors. work. and work even more
Daydreaming about those places to go, to see, to learn...and so on
Restless. bitter. jealous. confused. depressed. anxious. or is it anxiety first. who knows
I have recently spent time listening to, reading about and contemplating ideas that center on living a full life. a creative life. a peaceful life. A centered life.
The measure of your creation. It's a phrase I love and have a new fascination with.
What is that? How do you know? On a spiritual level...that's easy. or is it?
Finding joy in the journey when the days are filled with mundane, daily living tasks that offer no personal fulfillment or creativity whatsoever is draining. Breathe, they say. Yes. Breathe. Take time for yourself. Exercise. Eat right. Take your vitamins. Drink more water. And breathe.
Yes. Breathe. The fascinating thing about life is that we are all, in many areas, overqualified. We take jobs that pay bills. We buy homes in cities because of good schools and low crime. We live our lives based on what we feel is best for everyone at the moment. And then we ask ourselves whose lives we are living? What did we do with our dreams? Where did that girl go? We hit our forties and there is this mad pause, just long enough to realize that it looks different, somehow, than the plans you had in your twenties. Not bad, just different. You look at yourself in the mirror and see age. You see tired. You see the pain that has happened over these forty some odd years. You also see the smiles. The age shows experiences. Some of them you didn't expect or even ask for but weathered, beautifully you might add. And you did. If you have been so blessed you see that younger face in the faces of your children who are now dreaming as you once did. And you are jealous. A little.
We call this a midlife crisis for some.
But wait...just breathe. Accepting that we are overqualified for our lives is freeing in some way. Are you capable of being a respected author or well respected scientist? I could ask that question about every possible scenario so which one is yours? Which life do you dream of?
The measure of your creation is, in my opinion, far grander than job choice or home address. More than the daily tasks. More than the mundane. More than all of it. You are created for something so much bigger than we ever give ourselves the space to consider. What do we fear? What excuses do we grant ourselves, a bit like the child throwing a tantrum is really "just tired". (no he's not, by the way. he is being a brat) So many excuses... and we eat it up. We crave that because it is exponentially easier than giving it a try. Stop it!
Good news...being overqualified means that you have more to give. more to learn. more to see. more to love. more to grow. That is something you can hold on to and look forward to the next forty years with eager anticipation or what's next. Who will you be next year? Five years from now? Twenty?
So dream. smile. love. breathe. vitamins. eat right. work out. all of it matters. But above all else...find the measure of your creation and strive diligently to live up to it. You won't because you will never really know just how important you are but try. Always.
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